"nothing "goes" with jaegar. jaegarmeister is antisocial!"

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"I don't know, she knows more about it than I do." "No I don't!" "I have done it one time too!" "One time...too...many."
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"what about strawberry flavored cocaine?" "its not a blunt. The flavor needs to be more sophisticated than that!"
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"Definition of primp slap. Wait until the girl gets all prettied up THEN you slap her."
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"Its easy not to cheat when no one wants to f***you. "

"you're a dirty cunt sometimes, you know that?"

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I'm about tired of drunk people tonight guys. And LORENA, I'm not talking about you.

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"how was Ra? Did you get any ass last night?" "no" "oh sorry is that rude? That's what I always ask my girlfriends and the answer is usually yes"

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"his wife prolly has his password. she aint dumb. u saw her do the 50 yard dash."

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"This is a bullshit apple. This is another Midwest thing. It is so bland!"

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"He thought I was coming onto him and I was like 'look I just want your hummus, bitch!'"

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"whatever, he lives in the suburbs. Everything is scary and dangerous when you live in the suburbs"

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"can we give her a roofie so I can fuck him???"

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"Bet is off bitch. I'm not doing 2 married guys in 1 weekend!"

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"he can work on many different aspects of the democratic party" "yes including my ASSspect"

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"when I say 'he could be cute with a makeover' I mean that he could have a big dick" "it doesn't look like there's a big dick in there to me."

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"when you say 'that's a cute picture' it means that the person looks better in the picture than in person"

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"I like my men like I like my whiskey. Brown and straight." "yeah and feels good going down"

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"I think I'm going to take aderol so I don't eat and can save money. My prescription is great I can take it when I want to save money and if I want money to buy something else I can sell it"

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"I don't know if I like condoms made in Malaysia" "that's a long way for a condom to travel"

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This little lady came to the movies in her Sunday best!

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"I like to know what's going on in my mouth"

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