"Wait, is that her thong or is that a tattoo?"

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"You're showing me a picture of the back of your dog?" "No, that's a picture of Lorena passed out on New Year's"

"put on her seatbelt. You know the drunk ones are limber!"

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"Can I call you Shaniqua?" No! You can call me Cassidy-qua!"

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"You memorized your passport number? You're like Rain Man!"

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Drunk speak: "That cracker was so damn good ut yated homemade! Wtf?! Where iz it from? "

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"please click www.imtootired.org/bruised-buttcheek/nonhaircut.html.....for more info...standard web fees may apply check with local carrier.."

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"why are you acting so non-shalon?"

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"Caution filling may be hot." "I don't want hot fluids going down my throat."

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"those are SRP houses...oh wait nevermind those are like, picnic areas" "Ha ha ha!!! You mean like, ramadas?"

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"its SO this century! Its SO 2008!" "oh! First time someone said that. Ring a bell!"

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"may I please have a rum and jack?"

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"Look out dr. Phil here comes Dr.sulfab & u can read his blog at www.iknowhaters.com/backstabbing/narc_Jiveturkeyass"

"are you gonna pound those or can you stay for a little bit?"

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"Make sure to tell her how great it is. Chicks dig that. They also like when you choke them. Oops. My friend added that!"

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"you're a slut" "maybe its just because you have a long tongue!"

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" www.nofaith.com/i wasntbornyesterday_youloveittoomuch "

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"Seriously, dude. Stop touching this." "That's what he said"

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"Like you locked ur keys in it??? Or it was compounded??"

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"the guy that I know is named Salon Selectives"

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"wow you're always engaged married or in love! What about divorced ?"

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"IN ABOUT three dates you wont be lagging to responding to my messages cunt so relish it"

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"whoa look how far I can go!" "uh oh. That's not healthy!"

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"that's why they invented hip hop" "I don't know what that means" "I don't either buy I almost snorted Coke OUT my nose!"

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"You just made me say fuck you in my head and I'm not posed to be cursing!"

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